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How Do You Know If He's Available?

Spanish lips

Text and Image Copyright Notice. Published under copyright by Loveawake España. © Copyright 2010-2020. All rights reserved.

Debbie is attractive, sophisticated, worldly and confident.  She is not afraid to put herself out there to meet new men.

One day, Debbie was in a coffee shop and saw a cute guy.  Without hesitating, she went up to him and said, “I don’t know if you are married or not, but I think you’re cute.”

They started dating and having sex and sure enough…Debbie finds out the guy is married.

When Debbie questioned him, he said, “When we met you said you didn’t care if I were married or not, so I assumed you meant it.”

Imagine Debbie’s surprise and embarrassment!

Debbie assumed the guy was available to date (which he was) but mistakenly assumed he was available for an exclusive relationship (which he wasn’t).

If only Debbie had known what to do instead.

So how can you tell if a guy is available?  Or more importantly…how can you tell if a guy is available and interested in dating you?

1.   Catch His Eye and Smile

If you see a cute guy you’d like to meet, instead of approaching him and introducing yourself, catch his eye and smile.

If he doesn’t react or doesn’t approach you, chances are he’s not available or interested.  If this is the case, move on.  Find another cute guy and keep smiling.

2.  Wait for Him to Approach

After you’ve smiled, if he’s interested and available he will most likely approach you.  Wait for him to come to you.

(This can often be a nerve-racking experience because you can feel like a slut.  It can feel like you’re inviting him to molest you on the spot.  Don’t worry.  He’s going through his own meltdown as he’s crossing the room.)

3.  Let Him Speak First

If/when he does approach you, let him speak first.  If you speak first, you won’t know if he’s really interested and available.  He could just be acting polite.

4.  Follow His Lead

If he initiates a conversation; if he asks for your number; if he asks what you’re doing later, chances are good that he’s available and very interested.  This is very good.  Go with it if it feels right for you.

If he initiates a conversation but doesn’t ask for your number (usually within the first 15 minutes), this is not a good sign.  Again, he could just be polite and interested in flirting.

5.  Ask Him

Don’t lead with asking him if he’s single and available!  He most often will tell you.

If he doesn’t, but invites you out and you don’t feel comfortable not knowing if he’s involved with someone else, then ask.

There is nothing wrong with asking a man for information.  What is wrong is to assume that he’s interested, so that means he’s free and available.

And please don’t have sex without knowing his relationship status…unless you want to end up like Debbie!

Take care of yourself.  If a man wants you and is interested and available, he will usually let you know.  But if you’re uncertain, it never hurts to ask!

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